If the Swiss Alps swiped right, it would be on these Merrell shoes.

Let's be frank — these may well be the ugliest shoes to have ever shod the hoof of a discerning outdoor enthusiast. They're so bad, that after posting photos from a recent Mountaineers trip — photos of torrential waterfalls ringed by triple rainbows and unreasonably high cliffs — the first 3 comments read along the lines of, "sensible shoes bro. lol"

  Play safe out there.

Play safe out there.

Cruel, yet also correct. Sensible because they are without doubt the most comfortable, sturdy, light, and waterproof footwear I've ever romanced my extremities with. Seriously, I could almost hear them playing Barry White and drinking merlot with my instep.

They're that good.

Feet first —